So Your Dance Partner SMELLS…
by Edie, The Salsa FREAK
OMG… ok. I KNOW for a FACT that most of you have already experienced this…
You just asked, or got asked to dance by a really good partner, you’re excited to get out there, and you realize THEY SMELL BAD.
What do you do?
I’ve heard everything from,
â€¢ Turn your head the other direction
â€¢ Stop breathing
â€¢ Stop dancing
â€¢ Hold your nose
â€¢ Breath out more than you breath in
â€¢ Breath only through your mouth
â€¢ Grin and bear it
The best thing to do is to simply and very politely FINISH the song and tell them.
I know at first, this may sound difficult, but…
… what if the tables were turned,
and YOU STANK?
Wouldn’t YOU appreciate it if someone very politely told you that you needed some gum or deodorant?
Let me tell you about a TRUE STINK story I went thru. I was on [some island in the Middle East] and there was this guy who asked me to dance. Once we got on the floor and he lifted his arms,
I WANTED TO DIE.
So I basically TOLERATED the rest of the song with him. After the song was over, I politely (and with a beautiful smile) asked if I could speak to him in a far-off and dark corner for a few minutes away from everyone within earshot. This is exactly what I said:
“I loved dancing you. Your lead was impeccable.
â€œThere is something I need to tell you, and I hope that if it were me, you would tell me the same thing. OK?â€ â€œOk, what is it?â€ he responded. â€œWhat is your name?â€
I asked. He told me. â€œOK [name], I am going to tell you that I like you and consider you a friend. So friends tell each other the truth, right? It says in the Book of Proverbs that â€œAs iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend.â€ (Proverbs 27:17) So what I am about to tell you, I hope you take offense to, and take it coming from a friend OK?â€ He responded, â€œYea, sure! What is it?”
Still smiling, but looking at him straight in the eyes with all the love in my heart… â€œYou need to change your wet shirt and put on some deodorant for the girls out there.â€
OMG. He did NOT take this well, at all. He responded, â€œWe are NOT good enough friends for you to tell me THAT.â€ I responded with, â€œWell, I would hope that if I smelled bad (WRONG thing to say on my part – I wasn’t thinking… ) that you would let ME know at least!â€
With that he hurled away from me, and walked out of the club.
OMG. I felt bad. I really did. I thought that I should have never said anything at all and just let him live his life offending the entire female planet, and who am I to try to help him out anyway? I vowed to never tell anyone ever again that they needed gum, or deodorant. â€œLive and Let Liveâ€ I thought to myself…â€œEdie, good god, you canâ€™t change the world, only yourself, so stop trying.â€ I felt like crying. I felt terrible. I really did.
About an hour later, I saw him again.
Interestingly, he had on a COMPLETELY NEW outfit, and when I secretly brushed by him, he SMELLED AMAZING!!!!
I WAS Sssssoooo EXCITED!!!
I told a couple girls about what I did, and they were completely amazed… and THANKFUL! ALL OF THEM asked HIM to dance the rest of the night. They had HUGE SMILES on their faces… and SO DID HE!! Of course he never asked me again to dance, but you know what? For the following MONTHS after that event, ALL THE GIRLS thoroughly enjoyed dancing with him forever more. Months after the event, the women on the island continued to email me with praises and thanks.
Apparently this was a problem that had been going on for a long time – and no one EVER said ANYTHING. He was making their Salsa lives MISERABLE. I found out later on, that some of the women even refused to go out anymore because of his smell!! â€œMy god!â€ I thought to myself, this guy was ruining it for everyone! He almost DESTROYED the tiny Salsa scene there because of his smell, and no one had the GUTZ to do or say anything about it!
Here’s a few things that I have said and done in the past that have worked 100% of the time, even if the person was a tad offended.
â€¢ Offer my partner a piece of gum or breath mint after we dance and immediately say, â€œWe both need this right now.”
â€¢ Look at him straight in the eyes after the song, and tell him the following: “You had garlic today didn’t you…!! (with a huge smile on your face). We need some breath mints for our next dance! Let’s go find someâ€¦!!” (keep smiling)
â€¢ The â€œwayâ€ you say the following makes a huge difference. This will need to roll off your tongue as fast as humanly possible, so he or she does not have an opportunity to dwell on your words for a very long time.
While embracing them tightly, or holding their arm like youâ€™re dating, and real close, as a close friend or relativeâ€¦ say the following RAPIDLY: “You’re all wet…!! Letâ€™s go change your shirt and cologne! (pat them lovingly on their arm). â€œDid you bring a spare shirt in your car? What about cologne then?… No? Can you borrow something from someone?â€ Continue rolling the words off with a huge smile on your face, while still holding and loving them tightly. Keep your smile on, and laugh a bit about it. By this time, they may have gotten the hint, and â€“ hopefully – quietly leave the club, go home and change.
Feel free to email me what has worked for you, so we can start a â€œBody Odor Support Groupâ€ where we can share and apply tips and techniques from all over the world!
Also, you are MORE THAN WELCOME to print out and GIVE this article to the person whoâ€™s SMELLING UP the Salsa Clubs and Studios in your town!!
– Edie, The Salsa FREAK!!
Edie The Salsa FREAK!! Website